Sunday, July 22, 2012

Why I haven't been posting...

The perfect storm of no clay posts:

It's been really, really hot out.
I don't have air conditioning.
Clay melts when it's hot.
My arms keep falling off.

It's starting to cool down, though, so I hope to be back to weeklyish stories again soon. In the meantime, JP's been away for the past month and I'm currently between contracts*, so I've been keeping busy doing other things.

* unemployed

I've been procrastinating and writing and procrastinating. I'm working on a young adult science fiction horror novel. It's basically the polar opposite of anything that I write here. I hope that someday I'll publish it and you'll buy it anyway. Just don't complain too much if it's decidedly unfunny and you feel ripped off.

I've also come up with a fool-proof* system for getting my house organized.

* not really fool-proof

For the past four days, I've been setting my phone alarm for every hour, on the hour, and then again 10 minutes later. For those 10 minutes, I have to do something that I don't want to do. It's amazing how much I can get done in 10 minutes! And if I do it 7 or 8 or 9 times, then all of a sudden I've spent an hour and a half cleaning and organizing. For the first time in a very long time, I'm happy with the state of my house. I feel like I'm accomplishing something, and I spend less time internally curled up in shame at the fact that I spend most of my time wasting time.

I thought about writing a self-help book with my new hourly cleaning system. I'd call it something like the Easy-Breezy Super Patented Ten Minutes Doing Stuff That Makes Me Miserable system. Catchy, right? It would really only be useful for people who live alone, have no outside responsibilities, don't have jobs, and yet still can't seem to get their crap together. That's a market, right?

I also have a new TV show addiction on Netflix: Lie To Me. Lie To Me features Dr. Cal Lightman, an obnoxious but brilliant man who studies unconscious facial microexpressions to determine if someone is lying. These microexpressions can be really subtle, and most people won't catch them.

Here are some examples of microexpressions:

Like I said, these microexpressions are really subtle. Don't feel bad if you can't catch them. We can't all be naturals.

Enjoy the sunshine, lovely readers. And thanks for your patience.