Arguments with JP can be really unsatisfying.
Flounce over to the next aisle to stew for five minutes.
Decide that it isn't worth getting upset about.
Flounce back over to the next aisle to stew for five more minutes.
Decide upon my return to pretend that it never even happened.
I should just stay in the next aisle.
Editing to link up with Yeah Write 54 - one of the web's best writing communities!
Hehe, thanks for the giggle. Perked me up more than a coffee :P
ReplyDeleteHehe. Story of my life! Sometimes now I just nod and say "oh" ....because I just can't handle having that conversation again!
ReplyDeleteMy favorite part is when he turns it around like I was being irrational---you were mad? Geez, I hope you can relax and not let things get to you.
I'm NOT. haha. Thanks for the laugh this morning!
Oh...that whole "I hope you can relax"...that would result in me flouncing away for at LEAST 10 mins. Ha!
Deletegreat post, stephanie!! thanks for making me laugh at 7 a.m. -> now my happy vibe is set for the day!
ReplyDeletei'm totally referencing the seinfeld episode relating to the quiet talker, too...
i get so embarrassed if i have to say pardon twice. two requests for a repeat is my limit...then i just fake understanding if i still have not heard the person...i don't have the nerve to say SPEAK UP!!
i love the clay jp - esp his hairstyle!
I've actually never seen that Seinfeld episode, but you're not the only one who mentioned it! I should really learn to say "pardon" instead of "what".
DeleteSo true. I had a good chuckle at this. I would ask for Kitt's thoughts but I probably wouldn't hear them.
ReplyDeleteHaha! Giggled at this comment...
DeleteI feel her pain - I've encountered many quiet talkers in my day. Love the facial expressions - priceless!
ReplyDeleteThat's so funny! I have trouble hearing in public places. My poor sister is always the one who I'm asking to repeat herself. Something about the pitch of her voice...I just can't hear her! Makes me crazy. I'm such a dummy, I did R today instead of Q! I have to adjust tomorrow!!
ReplyDeleteYour posts never fail to make me literally LOL.
ReplyDeleteI love them. You're hilarious!
:D
M. x
I try to compensate for the loud people around me by talking quieter... it doesn't work. Now I'm learning how annoying it is because my older son just whimpers/whispers along at basically the same tone/ level as the wind in the car.
ReplyDeleteHahahahha I really love this one. Probably bc it reminds me of a convo with Boyfriend.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely! :)
ReplyDeleteThis post influenced me to add your button to my page. :) You make me laugh each day, so I'm willing to help you in any way possible :D
ReplyDeleteM. x
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoy my stories! :)
DeleteI went and got my ears checked because Boyfriend thought I must be losing my hearing. Now I have scientific proof that he mumbles.
ReplyDeleteI like to respond with "please speak louder" in an even softer voice than the other person. Doesn't get us anywhere, but self-satisfaction is sometimes more important than anything.
ReplyDeleteGreat job on the post...AGAIN!!!
My husband mumbles into the phone - which doesn't work very well anyway. So bad phone + mumbler = me yelling at him to talk into the damn phone already! I can't understand a thing he's saying! And then he acts like he's not holding the phone awkwardly or talking into his chest because he's laying on the bed. I will meet you in the next aisle and we can commiserate. Loudly.
ReplyDeleteIf you're going to say something, you may as well say it loud. Right?
DeleteHahaha, silly quiet talkers...
ReplyDeleteOh my god I love this! Seriously this is a conversation I have with my hubby ALL THE TIME :) I'm starting to get a complex thinking i need a hearing aide or something....and the "there's something wrong with your face" priceless.
ReplyDeleteOH. MY. GOD. I swear, woman, we are living the same life. Brian is a mumbler too!!! It drives me UP THE WALL!! (But he complains that my phone voice is obnoxiously loud.)
ReplyDeleteApparently my voice is ALWAYS obnoxiously loud, no matter where I'm talking. Ha.
Deletesadly i am the quiet talker... which isn't helped at all by the fact that hub is a drummer and has broken parts of his ear drums... so ya... I'm always repeated myself, and saying never mind... and then end up yelling... or at least, I think it's yelling - it's likely just speaking at normal volume.
ReplyDeletesigh.
hee hee....story of my life!
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh out loud and I really needed it. :) My hubby and I have the same argument constantly.
ReplyDeleteHehehe. I have the opposite problem. My husband is a LOUD talker. You're lucky. Ha ha ha - 'there's something wrong with your face!'
ReplyDeleteQuiet talkers drive me crazy. Boyfriend has been doing it lately and keeps telling me I need to listen better. No, you need to stop swallowing your words and enunciate them. OY!
ReplyDeleteYour mad clay figure is quite frightening. o_O
ReplyDelete-Barb the French Bean
oh my gosh, i live in a house with two people who either talk too quietly or can't hear properly. this is a recurring theme in our lives, dang it.
ReplyDeleteYou guys do the "your face" thing, too?!? We also say "your bum" sometimes to change it up. It often turns into "your face is a bum". We sound like 3 year olds. :P
ReplyDeleteMaybe you have all your posts planned out already... but I thought of something for "Y" that really bugs me... Yawning in public bathrooms. *ick* I feel like I'm sucking in the particulates of everyones eliminations.
Honestly, I've never even thought about yawning in public bathrooms! That's funny...
DeleteStory of my life... except that there really was something wrong with my ears!
ReplyDeleteHahahaha. My husband has an accent (I don't; duh), so when he yells to me from another room, with long sentences, I don't understand a word he's saying. We have been married over 14 years. I guess it will never change. But I have to pretend I can't hear anything so he'll come talk to me like a normal person. Then he says there's something wrong with my ears.
ReplyDeleteOops. I'm the quiet talker in our relationship. I'm positive there's something very wrong with my husband's ears and possibly his face. :P
ReplyDeleteI think I've actually had this conversation with my wife....verbatim! :)
ReplyDeletehaha It's a good thing there isn't really a volume issue with leaving comments on a blog or I'd be a quiet talker too.
ReplyDeleteOMG! My husband is a quiet talker too, and I'm always asking him "What?". I only get two tries because he hates repeating himself. We don't really argue about it, I just comment reminding him that I'm deaf (not really true, its mostly selective or when I'm watching tv. I like it loud!)
ReplyDeleteOn our first date, he was such a quiet talker that half the time I couldn't hear him. Rather than have him repeat himself, I just nodded and interjected a few "a huh" in there. It wasn't until our second date that I really got to know him.
Thanks for the laugh :)
The bit about your first date made me laugh. Good thing you gave him another chance!
DeleteMy favorite part is "You were mad?" This could so be my husband and me, except I'm the quiet talker who says "Never mind" when asked to repeat myself. I can't stand to repeat, so I sometimes say something completely different from the original statement, causing my husband to say, "That's not what you said before." Then I get mad and tell him that he obviously heard me the first time! Good clean fun.
ReplyDeleteOh Yeah. I've had the converstation before. The other night the hubby was ignoring me while "listening" to his head phones.
ReplyDeleteME: Babe, can you take the dog out?
Silence
Me: BABE, Can YOU take the DOG out?
Silence
Me: SCOTT!!!
Scott: WHAT?!
Me: Can you take the dog out?
Scott gets anus lips starts grumbling about why I have to ask him so many times and then stomps around for a half an hour....
Seriously? I hate man PMS.
Anus lips? BAHAHAHAHAHA!
Deletelol, yeah all pursed like he sucked on something sour or something! Kinda looks like an anus...IMO. LOL
DeleteLove this!
ReplyDeleteI tried commenting before, but my phone was being a butt.
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh so hard. I love, love, love clay Stephanie's angry face. I had to post it on my facebook. Too good not to share.
Something similar happens between my husband and me. I'm the one who gets aggravated because he can't hear me. I'm not a quiet talker... I'm just, say, in our bedroom looking for something and he's 2 rooms over in the kitchen with the dishwasher running so he can't hear me yelling.
ReplyDeleteit's the slightly aggrieved "never mind" that gets me, which gets ratcheted up with the "there's something wrong with your hearing." I don't live with a quiet talker, I live with a mumbler. The problem is not with my hearing, the problem is with the cache of small pebbles he apparently keeps tucked in his cheek pouches like some kind of damn squirrel worried about winter.
ReplyDeleteconsider this a flounce, in comment form.
"Never mind." Bah. I laughed at the mental image of a squirrel carrying pebbles. Ha!
DeleteThis is totally my husband and I. He complains I never listen but he mumbles.
ReplyDeleteWhat?
ReplyDeleteAhh yes. In the summer we have fans going all the time, don't really need central air. I get so frustrated no one can hear me, and Hon is mad because I don't listen. Finally when we turn them off I find we still don't hear or listen to each other. I am a famous mumbler, and I never finish my sentences. We finally just quit talking to each other. Works fine. Great post.
ReplyDeleteHa! Glad you found a solution that works for both of you.
DeleteOh an try talking to your kids when they are on a computer or video game.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like all families experience the above... to some degree or the other... a universal affliction!
ReplyDeletePhew - what a relief to discover...
And here I thought it was going to be a parody of the low talker sketch from Seinfeld! Very funny stuff.
ReplyDeleteYou're the second person to mention that! I haven't seen that episode, though...
DeleteROFLOL!!! This is SO me and my hubby (who is hard of hearing but won't wear his hearing aids).
ReplyDeleteHA!!!! "you were mad?"
ReplyDeletebest,
MOV
Heh.. supposedly I'm the quiet talker; My husband is deaf in one ear, so whenever we go out, we have to configure ourselves so I'm on the right, or there's no point trying to have a conversation.
ReplyDeleteMy ex-husband mumbles ALL of the time. I am constantly saying, "WHAT?"
ReplyDeleteMy husband mumbles and has a really soft voice. This is us down to a t.
ReplyDeleteThank you. My wife and I had a good laugh over this one. Good luck with the rest of the alphabet.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is a soft talker. I feel like a barely know her because I miss everything she says, even when I am sitting right next to her. When I ask her to repeat, I get the "never mind". Loved this.
ReplyDeleteI had a soft talking neighbor once and it drove me crazy! I kept leaning closer and saying "What?" repeatedly and still could only make out a small percentage of what she said.
ReplyDeleteThe worst part was that I seemed to be the only neighbor who had trouble hearing her--which was bizarre because it made me feel like everyone else had super hearing. :-o
Another FABULOUS post, Stephanie! :D
Haha I loved this. The Chef and I have the hardest time communicating. I am not a quiet person... in fact you can read my old school reports... "Elle is loud and boisterous and could challenge her energy better" SERIOUSLY... but the chef sometimes... for the reason I can only think of to PISS ME OFF... goes all deaf on me and I have to repeat myself like a MILLION times. On the final time of repeating, he's like... ok, don't get pissed and well then I am mega bitch pissed!!! WHY can't he just listen... and why when I mutter... 'cock muncher' under my breath can he HEAR?! There is some serious selective hearing going on in my house... and selective volume in yours... gah... men! Hahahaha... you seem to have inspired a rant... eek...
ReplyDeleteLove Elle xo
Laughed out loud at your rant. Sorry that you can relate.
DeleteWonderful.
ReplyDeleteYou seriously are the funniest blogger I know. My husband is very obvious whenever we see anyone famous and I'll give him a shush and he gives me the "why are you so sensitive, what's the big deal" and I give him a "c'mon no big deal" and he gives me the, much louder now reply. I need to find my own aisle too.
ReplyDeleteI take it from this that you see a lot of famous people! I never see famous people. Famous people mostly don't go to crappy places. Ha!
DeleteNext time you should just whisper the I love you afterward and give him a taste of his own quiet talking medicine.
ReplyDeleteHilarious!!! I'd say more, but I have to give my phone to my husband so he can read this because he totally claims everyone else is mumbling - I hear him tell someone, "I don't want to never mind, just tell me what you said" at least fifty times a week.
ReplyDeleteHaha! I've just remembered something similar! There's a teacher at my school who's partly deaf and you literally have to shout to get his attention. And there's a girl who used to be in his class who talks so quietly she's practically whispering. In fact, whispering would be louder than her voice!
ReplyDeleteShe was kinda a bit of a drama queen...
so in the classes the teacher would ask a question, she would answer it, practically without saying it, and after the millionth time of asking what she'd said, she would burst out crying!
Just...speak louder, maybe?
*splutter* quite people! God! *roles eyes*
M. x
OMG I love this! I'm irritated by quiet talkers aswell, I think it's cuz I'm ridiculously loud :/
ReplyDeleteLoved this! I used to say 'never mind' to my father-in-law who was extremely deaf, and then he started guessing what I might have said. There were some hilarious exchanges but it made me feel so guilty.
ReplyDeleteHahaha. This is so funny because we all understand! I love your clay posts. I'm sorta addicted now.
ReplyDeleteOooh, I'm addicted too. One of my favorite parts is when you say that arguing with him can be completely unsatisfying---um, really? A proper fight requires some volume! Great piece, Erin
ReplyDeleteMy favorite picture is the one of you after he says, "You were mad?" thanks for cracking me up this morning! My mom has a terrible time hearing my husband, especially on the phone (I don't understand the problem; I can hear him fine.). I'm sure she would agree with this post!
ReplyDeleteFFS this is hystercial. my god. the clay pictures... oh my god it's just way too freaking funny. thank you. :)
ReplyDeleteHaha!! Oh my goodness!! I love, love this. Those faces?! Are just perfection.
ReplyDeleteBahaha! Most excellent!
ReplyDeleteI lost it on the first pic with the itty bitty caption.
lol, :-)
ReplyDeleteThere's something wrong with your face = hehehehe.
ReplyDeleteHA! I'm married to one of those, too! Perfectly depicted here. Thanks for the laugh!
ReplyDeleteThat's whatcha call a communication breakdown.
ReplyDeleteOh, my gosh this is me and my husband...except my clay hair is a little darker brown. But yeah, my hubby is definitely a mumbler. If I have to say, "What?" more than a few times he gives up, too. And that's so annoying...just speak up, people!
ReplyDeleteFantastic!!!! Would love to know how you do it!
ReplyDeleteWere you spying on me?? Loved this!
ReplyDeleteLOL, hilarious!
ReplyDelete"There's something wrong with your face" is my go to comeback!
That was hysterical! I'm married to one just like that. 16 years and he's never changed. Haha!
ReplyDeleteLOL this is hilarious! I think we get this when we are growing older with each other ;)
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh--I never talk loud enough for my husband and we have that same conversation all the time. So I get closer, and talk louder. Then he tells me I'm shouting o_O
ReplyDeleteI love this!
ReplyDeleteMy mumbler of a husband also sometimes mumbles while facing the other direction. That is ALWAYS fun.
ReplyDeleteLove the small print when he is being a quiet talker!
My husband mumbles half the time then gets infuriated with me for a) not answering when he asks a question, because I had no idea he even spoke b) ask him to repeat himself.
ReplyDeleteNot my fault!!
I hate it when a quiet talker throws my ears under the bus! Oy! :) Ellen
ReplyDeleteI get admonished for my "loud talking" all the time. I do blame it on all the poor listeners!
ReplyDeleteI have had this exact experience countless times with my husband. Too funny!
ReplyDeletefirst time here, i love the clay people. and i should so send my husband to read this, so funny, and yet, so true!
ReplyDelete