Tuesday, March 6, 2012

A Letter From the Teacher

** Note: This story was first posted on We Band of Mothers. I am reposting it here so that I can keep all of my stories in one place. **






They were play-wrestling. I thought this one might need an explanation.





















37 comments:

  1. Hahaah those are great. The vomit one is my fave for sure.

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    1. I had to bite my tongue not to burst out laughing at that one. My favourite, though, was the see-through nighties one. Mainly because his mom was there when he said it, and her eyes got HUGE. Kids are hilarious.

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  2. i was a preschool teacher for a year & i heard some seriously crazy stories from kids. you did a great job with this! so funny.

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    1. Kids are hilarious. While I don't always miss the stress of classroom teaching, I really do miss laughing all day at work.

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  3. LOVE THIS! I definitely need to be more careful what I say around Cinderella. She remembers EVERYTHING!

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    1. She remembers AND she repeats! Ha! (Don't worry, though. Teachers really don't believe everything we hear.)

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  4. "Math makes mommy need wine."

    This one especially makes me laugh because both of my parents are math teachers.

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    1. That's a lot of math in one house!

      My favourite Christmas gift as a teacher was from a child who handed me a bottle of wine and said "Mommy says you probably need this." Ha!

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  5. Hilarious! Love the one about you getting the perfume mommy doesn't like!
    And yay! The subscription took this time so you're showing up in my inbox!

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    1. And the best part was, I actually did like the smell of the bath gel. I'm glad you're getting me by email now!

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  6. Hi! Please follow my blog. Thanx..

    http://mehmetaydiner.blogspot.com

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    1. This is my very first spam comment! I'm rather fond of you now Memado. Thank you.

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    2. Get the Wil Wheaton collating paper pic to post on HIS wall!

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    1. I'm sorry that you're dead. Do they make giant hats for that?

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  8. OMG. I am emailing this post to the faculty at my school.

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    1. I just hope I never get in trouble for writing it! Ha!

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  9. And we, as parents, believe everything that is said about teachers. XX.

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    1. Oh god, I hope not. Bahaha! I could write a whole new post about things that kids have probably said about me. That's why I think that parents and teachers should unite and each promise to only believe half.

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  10. oh, these are a HOOT, stephanie!! and i love your plasticine children! i love "i didn't finish my homework because math needs mommy need wine." but they are all very funny.
    on a serious note, just the last couple weeks, there has been a story getting major press in our local paper: a little girl drew a picture of a gun, at school, and her teacher followed up with family & children's services, the police got involved and arrested the dad, searched the home...turned out to be a toy gun. there has been a ton of backlash and discussion about where you draw the line with what kids report at school, etc.
    i like your funny examples, much more!

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    1. That's such a tricky situation. As teachers, we can't decide whether or not we want to call child services...if we even have an inkling of a doubt, we're morally and legally obliged to call. I wouldn't have even thought to report a picture of a gun - ALL kids draw pictures of guns, especially boys - but maybe there was more to the story. What a bad situation for everyone involved.

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  11. Ah hahaha, brilliant as always. I prefer to believe everything children say--life would be so much more interesting if their reality was the real reality. (Well, except the being hit in the head business--I'm thinking more unicorns and the ability to fly...)

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    1. Or when a kid looks at you and says - in all seriousness - I have millions of dollars in my piggy bank. Ha!

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  12. Heh...these are hilarious! Lots of "too much information" going on!
    It looks like my second subscription took so I'm getting your Clay Baboon notifications...of course I failed when I tried to comment using my phone yesterday...so, one step at a time!

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    1. I'm glad that I can stalk your inbox now! ;)

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  13. Clay kids saying the darndest things = comedy gold! :D

    Thanks for the laugh this morning!

    -Barb the French Bean

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    1. Thanks for stopping by for a visit! :)

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  14. My daughters' kindergarten teacher used to always say this to me, rather pointedly, I thought. ; ) I really don't want to know what my daughter was telling her.
    One time, a neighbor had given us a few slices of pie around holiday time, and we already had so much (junk)yummy stuff. I kept it for a few days but ended up throwing it away. The neighbor asked how we liked it, and just as I said, "It was great!" my daughter said, "Mommy threw it away." Awesome.

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    1. Ha! This comment made me laugh out loud. Awesome, indeed.

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  15. A friend of mine, once the teacher noticed the lupus marks on his torso, told his kindergarten teacher that his father beat him.

    He did not.

    Children are fun!

    Pearl

    p.s. I love your stuff and have added you to my blogroll.

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  16. I know I said this before, but I seriously want a t-shirt that says "I didn't finish my homework because math makes Mommy drink." Complete with one of the cute little clay kids. I was actually telling one of my coworkers about it today.

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    1. Maybe I'll start my own fashion line. Ha!

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  17. Saw this again on the link from your meta-blogging post, and I am compelled to comment! I remember hearing through a bookseller that there had been teenage kids coming in asking for the book "Tequila Mockingbird." A *facepalm* moment if ever there was one.

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