Tuesday, December 27, 2011

My Worst Ever Job Interview

My worst ever job interview was for a teaching position at an alternative school.

You would think that - at an interview for a teaching position - I would be ready for that question.

You would think wrong.

Think, Stephanie. Think.

(Say something. Say something. Say something.)

My face still frozen in an awkward and slightly manic smile, I tried to glance over and see what she was writing.

(Good stuff? Was she writing good stuff?)

Looking back, she probably wasn't writing good stuff.

Suddenly, I heard a shout from across the room, where some of the children were playing math games.

I waited as my interviewer pulled the child aside for a quick discussion and then came back to sit at the table.

Long silence.

I didn't get the job.


  1. Oh my gosh....that's awful and hilarious all at once!

  2. stephanie!!! oh, what a story. i am squirming in awkwardness for you!!
    i think it's a good thing that you did not get the job. sometimes alternative is good, sometimes it is just...weird.
    once again, your people and captions and write up are superb. thanks for such a fun read and for making me laugh!

  3. Ha ha ha. This is so funny. I love how it's her son! This sort of reminds me of a job interview I had for a teaching assistant position where I (somehow) did get the job even though my son threw an apple at one of the main donor family's son's head during the interview. Luckily, the teacher had no children and loved me.

  4. @Cathy, no, you're right...the job wasn't for me. It was actually a pretty cool school, but the pay was abysmal and the complete lack of structure - while right for some people - just wasn't right for me. But yes, it was one of my most embarrassing moments, for sure. (Shockingly enough, they ended up giving me a second phone interview. I still didn't get the job.)

    @Shell Flower, I'm all for allowing children to break free of gender shackles and be themselves...but please don't be shocked when strangers think your long-haired boy in gender-neutral clothes is a girl. I'm glad that you got the job despite the apple-throwing! Ha!

  5. Oh, that is so not good. But I think it's kind of weird that the interview would take place in a classroom (is that normal?) and that she'd be in the same classroom with her son.

  6. I agree with Zo ... good thing you DIDn't get that job!

  7. @Zo, it was a *very* alternative school. I think that she actually started the school because she was displeased with her son's experience in public school. It was really more like unschooling, except in a school. Or something like that. We were talking at a table while another teacher supervised the kids in the room. It was...very odd.

  8. HAHAHA! Ohhh, so not the ending I saw coming, but wow. That certainly does classify as a bad interview...

  9. BAAHAHA - wait. Really? REALLY? This actually happened? That like only happens in movies!!

    (Steph, I know I'm the Nazi blogging etiquette crusader, but if you respond to comments in the comments, I [and other readers] won't be able to see your lovely responses...remember Top 3 Things Well-Meaning Bloggers Do That Drive Readers Nuts)

  10. BAHAHA! I was not expecting that ending! That is so funny.

    I hate that moment in a job interview where you start to think that you don't know what to say, and then it just intensifies and the more you think about it, the more you REALLY don't know what to say. It's terrible. That happened to me in my job interview for my current job but luckily they still hired me. I did not call my boss's son a girl though... ;)

  11. I love the awkward smiling portion of the interview...

    That sounds more like a narrow escape than your worst ever job interview!

  12. @Sophia Oh. Right. I hate Blogger's default commenting system...makes it so hard to actually respond to anyone. Not that you're reading this. And YES, it really did happen, exactly like that. (Although, for some odd reason, they ended up giving me a second phone interview. I *still* didn't get the job.)

    @happyorhungry, if by funny you mean "humiliating and cringe-inducing" then yes, it was very funny! And yes, that "deer in the headlights" feeling is awful.

    @areyoukiddingme, perhaps it was both.

  13. Hi Stephanie,

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. Ohmygoodness, do you make those clay scenes yourself? What fun art therapy. I definitely need to learn more about you. :)

    Sorry about the job. I didn't get my dream job last year and I"m STILL not over it. Grrrr. :)

  14. I have a job interview coming up, so this is good...I'll just do the opposite! hehe. Too bad we can't control when the mind-going-blank thing takes a hold of us.

  15. @Lanie, although I realize that they look like a 7-year-old made them, I make them all myself. It's fun and I like using my hands for something other than typing. re: the job...honestly, I'm not disappointed I didn't get it. But I'm sorry you didn't get yours!

    @Kiah, good luck on your interview!

  16. I love it...especially..."That's My Son!!"

  17. buahahahahahah! I was asked to come in dn bring some of DH's army gear to my friends preschool for the kids to try on. When I got there, this one little girl with beautiful blond Shirley Temple ringlets loved trying on the stuff. I mentioned to the parent helper "wow, she loves it more than the boys" to which she replied "he is a boy, he's my son".

  18. @reccewife, haha! I'm glad I'm not the only one! I'm all for letting kids express themselves. But if your small kid has really long hair, then you can't really be surprised if people think he's a girl...

  19. OMG . . . this was awesome . . . thanks for the laugh .. . at your expense. .. but a hearty one at that! Love you babe! You're a riot!

  20. @Natalia...don't know how I missed your comment. Love you, friend! Errr...not that you're ever going to see this. But just in case.

    @Becky yeah, only in hindsight! Ha!

  21. Just keep on making those great plasticene models - therapeutic in this sort of situation I imagine!! We've all been there..